Amanda and The Photoshoot – 07
On payday Rich reached out. He was out of Dilaudid. He had Tramadol, weaker and longer-acting, and the next Dilaudid supply would cost more. He mentioned fentanyl. She declined without deliberating. She understood the fentanyl mortality profile precisely and she was not at the point where that profile was acceptable to her. She took the Tramadol. Three quarters of the jar was gone within twenty-four hours. She sat with that and understood what it indicated about the trajectory she had been mapping accurately since the first dose. The Tramadol was not sufficient. She thought about her mother’s Xanax. Two hours by bus. She had not been to her parents’ house since before October. She let herself in with the code and went directly to the medicine cabinet. Three pills. She stood in front of the …