For my stupidity when I drank too much, I told my husband he could punish me however he wanted,I should have put more thought into what I said.
We have just got home from a long weekend away, I had to apologise to my loving husband because I was a fool and got drunk at a party I went to” just for an hour” and my friends left me there without a ride home and I don’t know how but I ended up on the bed of the guy whose party it was and although he didn’t rape me he had sex with me, which to be honest at the time I thought was just a bad dream, but now I have nightmares about .
He thought so much of me he got me in his car and dropped me off about 5 blocks from where I lived at 3 in the morning in the snow, in heels, with just a light jacket skirt and tee shirt on, no underwear , I assume the bastard kept my panties and bra as a souvenigher of his conquest or maybe the loser jacks off in them on the nights he can’t get a drunk idiot like me into his bed.
I guess I was lucky because a snow plow driver called the police when he saw me stumbling along the road crying and they took me to the local hospital ,where of course they called my husband, and if you thought that was bad enough it went downhill from there.
He came to the hospital and of course they told him I had had sex but I had told them I was drunk and had been to a party so after hearing that they didn’t want to know, I was just another stupid woman who could not keep her legs closed after a few drinks, and I am assuming that’s what they told Mike my husband.
He came into the room where i was half asleep from the drugs and the vodka I had consumed, he looked at me and said you will be OK,and he left. I called him the next day at like 8 after the doctor had visited me to say they were releasing me in an hour and he said he was too busy to come and get me, he suggested I get a cab home, pack and get my shit out of HIS house.
He was always home by 5.30 in the evening, that night he didn’t get home until almost 8 pm and he wouldn’t answer his phone all evening. When he got home I was crying my eyes out but he just ignored me,when I put his dinner on the table he picked up the plate and tipped the food in the trash and went upstairs to bed. I went up there almost hysterical begging him to speak to him, but he just looked at me like I was a piece of shit, and when I said ” talk to me talk to me I was raped ” he grabbed me pushed me against the wall stood three inches from my face and screamed ” no cunt your were not, you wanted what you got,so pack your shit and fuck off ,go find your boyfriend and fuck him ” .
I spent the night laying on the couch crying,I hardly slept at all, and in the morning I could hear my husband in the shower, so I got up made his coffee washed my face and I was in the kitchen when he came down the stairs. He looked at me said ” so you’re still here”, and when I said” I have made your coffee ” he threw it in the sink and walked out the door.
I called into my work and told them I was sick, and spent the rest of the morning doing what I had done all night, I laid on the couch and cried, until by lunchtime I was all cried out ,my tears were all used up , my throat hurt from crying and I was having big sobs every few minutes.
I left a message on my husbands cell phone,I begged him to come home after work, and I sat down and wrote him a letter. By the time I had thrown the 9th or 10th attempt away I just decided to stop starting again ,I was never going to get it right,so I wrote what I could. I emptied my heart , begging him to take me back as his wife ,telling him he could do whatever he wanted to me I didn’t care what it was as my punishment.
At 4.30ish I went and had a bath, did my hair , worked on my puffy eyes with frozen whisky stones, put on my makeup, the black dress and blouse that were his favorite and the ankle strap shoes he bought me one time, and I was being Mrs. Home Maker , the housewife from the 60’s , I should have been called Samantha from the old TV show Bewitched.
At 5.25 I left the letter on the table and I went and sat in the front room, I heard his car pull up and the garage door open and close and the back door close as he came into the kitchen I sat there for five minutes with a quivering lip ,I was determined not to cry and spoil my make up.
I had my eyes closed because I was praying he would find the note and have it in his heart to forgive me, I can even remember telling God that “I knew not what I had done”.
I am not a religious person but I guess I had heard something along those lines when I was at church on one of the rare occasions I went with my Mother after Father died. I opened my eyes with a start as Mike said ” what this”, and he was holding the letter I wrote inches from my face. “I said I can’t face you and tell you how I feel so I tried to write it down “.
I watched as he crushed my letter up into a ball, and he almost threw it as he bounced it off my head . I could feel the tears coming back into my eyes, and he said “well if you can’t tell me to my face then get on your knees and put your nose on the carpet and tell me.”
It took me a few seconds to grasp what he had said, I looked at him and he stepped back a few steps and stood with his fists clenched. I was scared the way his fist were clenched and said “don’t hit me please Mike”, and he said,” why not,” and I began to cry. I slid off the coach and got on my knees and leant forward putting my nose on the ground like I was a slave.
” Well ” he said ” what did you write in the pissy note that you should have said to me ” ? I was crying, I tried to tell him that I loved him more than life itself and I was sorry for hurting him like I did and although I knew he would never forgive me if he would give me one more chance I swore I would do everything I could to be the best wife ever .
OK thats what I was supposed to say, but between the tears and the sobs I kind of think it came out nothing like that, in fact he told me later that he had no idea what the hell I was babbling about. Still kneeling on the floor crying I said one more time” I do love you”, and he said “is that it,is that all you have to say “. I whispered “yes” , and he put his foot by the side of the letter he had scrunched up into a ball and he tapped it with his foot so it rolled and touched my face .
” I guess the most important part you didn’t mean then did you” he said . I picked it up and got up off my forearms onto my knees wiped the tears from my eyes and started to undo the scrunched up ball of paper. As soon as I started to undo it I realized what he meant. I said “I don’t need to read the note”, I knew he had read it so I said ” I mean it, you can punish me anyway you want ”
I think it is about now that I should explain that after five years of marriage and a year of dating before that, the only side I had ever seen of my husband was the loving hard working happy go lucky guy who wasn’t exactly the most exciting guy in bed, but he always let me get on top of him and climax before he climbed on me and finished.
But as I knelt there that evening I could see nothing but hate for me in is eyes, and I knew he wanted to explode but he didn’t know how. I got up and went up to our bathroom, I picked up my wooden hair brush and went back downstairs.
When I went back in the sitting room he was sitting in the chair reading my note. I took it from his hands , and let it drop to the floor, I handed him my hair brush lifted my skirt up and pulled down my pantie before stepping out of them and laying over his lap.
Pulling my skirt up even further I said ” spank me, spank me hard” . I laid there for a minute, I could feel his cock moving on my tummy, he was starting to get a hard on, the suddenly he landed the wooden back of the hair brush across my bottom. It hurt and I grimaced, “one” I said , he moved his legs and smacked my bottom again.”Two” I said as I bit my lip, three made me go “AAGGHHH” out loud , which seemed to trigger a button somewhere in Mikes head.
The hairbrush started to rain down on my bottom without mercy, by number seven I was crying like a baby and by the time the tenth stroke had landed on my butt cheeks I could not speak for crying and screaming.
I lost count completely , placing a hand over my bottom to stop the blows raining down on me he opened his legs dropping me onto the floor, rolling me onto my back I watched through my tears as he undid his pants pulled off his underwear, got between my knees and push his cock deep into my cunt, saying ” come on you slut fuck me” , ” come on whore fuck me like you fucked him last night,” and suddenly without any warming he fell on me and started to cum.
Even though I was still crying from the pain of my spanking, and my bottom being rubbed up and down the carpet didn’t help ,I remember thinking Thank you God for letting him fuck me now I know everything will be OK.
I am guessing God only half heard me that night , for two weeks I had to sleep in the spare room, and when Mike fucked me it was without love or any feeling and always from the back, as if he didn’t want to look at me. Then he came home last week and said we were going away for the weekend and we have just returned from a three day mini vacation in a fabulous cabin (read house bigger than ours) in the woods ,on its own peninsula in Wisconsin, where Mike gave me the punishment he said I deserved.
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