My friends and I skipped the game, and went home to change for our boyfriends.
“Uh,” we all rolled our eyes, “What’s with baseball, anyway?”
“I know, it’s so boring, and how can it even be fun to play?”
“We’re not even cheerleaders,” I decided, “And this is going to take a while, so why don’t we go, and get dressed up to go out?”
“Go out where?” Heather dug her keys out, so we followred her back between the bleachers to the parking lot.
“I don’t know, anywhere our boyfriends want to take us after the game.” Since mine was driving, but at least he tries to find someplace romantic to park.
“Yeah, the’s school clothes are totally hot.” Somebody else joked, sarcastically, “In the worst way.”
It was the middle of June, and almost summer, which ment this game was important. If you gave half a flip about frigging boring old Baseball, but our dates were into it, and yeah they usually got sweaty, somehow. Sitting on the bench half the game, and then standing out in the field, waiting for the ball the other half.
“Huh!” I know what she ment about the school clothes, the dress code said you have to cover up every inch of your skin, except your hands, and face. Next year, they’d probably make us wear masks, and veils, so the boys don’t get distracted, as if they can’t concentrate on their stupid game with us waving from the fence.
But Heather got the minivan from her folks, and that fit all of us with one to spare. So, she fired up the air condition, and we popped out the windows to blow out the hot air on the way out.
“Okay, Cameron, you’re closest, right?”
“I guess, if you make the block.” I heard the turn signal ticking, and nodded, so she just pulled over to the turn lane, and avoided the like, in the protected right.
“Just be a minute.” I hopped out, and Heather leaned over the passenger seat. The window motor wined, so I looked back. “You forgot your homework.” The girls passed my bookbag up to Shelly, to hand it to me, but we’d already done all our lessons, waiting for the boys to come out of the locker room, and take the field.
“We’ll be right back.” She drove off, with the girls to play bus driver, and give the all a chance to change, for our dates. Honestly, as much as I’d like to have them there, to help me decide on the best shoes. Flats, or pumps? Pumps look better, but if we go somewhere that we have to walk around, like if there’s a party after the game, then flats make a lot more sense.
If you ask 1 girl, though. That’s a second opinion, if you ask 5 girls, then we’ll just go though my whole entire wardrobe, jewelry, and makeup cases, and debate every single one as if it’s international trade politics at the UN instead of which mascara matches this top best?
“Huh!” I just threw it in my room, then I heard something.
‘u u u,’ Grunting, it sounded like, down the hall. Then “Uh uh uh!” At mom, and dad’s door, and my cheeks warmed up. “Ah Ah AH!” Wow, it sounded like she was really getting it, so I just shook my head, and went back to the bathroom. Brushing my hair out, and touching up my eyes, also thinking about my boyfriend, Dylan.
“Huh?” Then, I heard a honk out front, the bumper scrape on the driveway, and even the motor cut out, in front of the garage.
“Oh my god.” I forgot, completely about the driveway, the empty driveway when we pulled up, and I don’t really care about cars either, but I know the exact sound of dad’s old ford scraping the driveway on the way in, and cutting the motor in front of the garage like I know the scuffs in the hallway carpet.
So, I ran back to the door, and knocked, without even thinking. “Mom, dad’s here!”
I didn’t even hear any more. Sex grunting, and panting in there, so for a moment, I even told myself that it was a false alarm, or maybe I was just imagining things, because I was getting ready for a hot date, and maybe this time, I’d actually go through with it before the school year ends.
Then, I heard their bedroom window, so I figured she was just letting whoever she had in there out that way, when I heard the front door downstairs.
“Hurry up!” Then, I met mom down the hall, right in front of my bedroom, pulling her ear rings out, and I guess I was a little mad at dad, because she looked up, and saw it on my face.
“What’s wrong?”
Then, dad came in the front door, and closed it.
“Uh?” I don’t know why at first I thought mom was in there, cheating, and I went to cover for her. Then when I saw her on the stairs, I thought dad was in there with another woman, and that made me jealous for her? I mean, is it any less a sexist double standard if it’s okay for a married woman to sleep around, but not a married man?
“Oh nothing, I’m going out, but there’s probably going to be a party after the game.” I rushed downstairs, as soon as mom let me past, and dad stopped me “Oh, there’s a game tonight?”
“Yeah, the girls’ll be here any minute,” I hopped up to kiss his cheek, “Goodnight.”
“Stay safe.” Mom called down the stairs, and dad yelled “NO BOYS.”
“I know, dad. Bye.” I took a deep breath, and waited for him to close the door, but if the girls weren’t waiting at the end of the driveway, then who did he honk at, when he drove up? “Huh!”
It doesn’t matter, probably just some neighbor driving the other way, or waving from their yard, but I went over to the corner of the garage, and leaned up, until I smelled smoke.
“Hey.” My sister jumped, and whirled around. “Can I have a puff?” I held out my hand, but I couldn’t help grinning. So, she rolled her eyes, and handed it over. No lipstick to see where her lips had been, but I didn’t care, because she’s my sister. My big sister, “Mel?”
“Huh what?” I handed it back, and she looked at the filter. To turn it between her fingers, and flick off the ash, then took another puff in between my lipstick stains.
I looked down the side yard down the gate. “So, who were you in there with?”
“Huh!” She took another drag, and her hand was shaking. “Nobody, mom got this new. Toy.”
“Sex toy?” I never thought to check if she had any, because she’s happily married, and she still gets plenty from dad.
“Huh, yeah and it’s amazing! It’s got these little metal beads, like a ballchain around the middle, 4 rows, and they roll around in the opposite directions.”
“That doesn’t sound, very comfortable.”
“Yeah, well it’s under the skin.”
“Oh, it’s got skin?” I never even heard of a dildo, or vibe with skin before.
“Well, it’s like a built in rubber, and.” That’s when Heather pulled up, with the minivan empty, and honked.
“Uh, I’ve got to go, but to be continued?” I ran off, before I had to listen to her gush any more, but I didn’t look back, or even hear her follow me back down the driveway. I just opened up the shotgun door, until Heather called out. “Oh, hey Melanie.”
“Uh, my mom and dad kicked us out for the night, probably to screw or whatever, so you mind if I ride along with you?”
“Well, we’re going to pick up the rest of the girls, but it’s a 7 seater. So, if you don’t mind being crowded in with a bunch of Sophomores, and Juniors yeah, hop in.”
So then she rolled the door back, and sat down in the middle. Shut the door, and Heather drove off with the both of us, but I just sat there, and tried to will my face to stop blushing.
“You’re quiet, all of a sudden.” Heather made the turn, so then the turn signal stopped clicking, and snapped back up when she let the wheel turn back straight.
“Huh,” I just nodded, and tried to breathe through my mouth, because Mel brought her sex stink in with her, and even with the air conditioner blowing, it filled up the whole van. Well, minivan, but still. Enough volume for me, Heather, 4 of our friends, and my sister.
“Well, this is a little embarrassing, but I just had a close call, and you pulled up before I had a chance to thank Cam for covering for me.”
“Huh, no problem.” I felt a little better, but then, before we got to the next girl’s house, I told Heather what I heard. “I thought it was mom, and dad at first, then I heard dad pull up in the driveway, so I thought it was mom in there with another man.”
“Oh, so that’s why you said. ‘Mom, dad’s here,” instead of mom, and dad Are here.”
“Oh, no yeah. I was calling you mom, because I thought well. You sounded like mom getting boned.”
“So, your mom is really loud when she’s doing it with your dad.”
“Yeah, sometimes when it gets really passionate.” Melanie just answered, and we pulled up at the next girls’ house, but they weren’t ready yet. Because they’re sisters, so they probably “Helped” each other pick something out, and argued over makeup instead of just changing and doing their own faces.
“So, that explains why you didn’t change.”
“I changed my hair, and my makeup.” She cut the motor, and the air conditioner with it. “See?” She looked up, and around my face, which had cooled of since we changed the subject.
“Oh yeah. You look fine.”
So then, Melanie started gushing about mom’s new sex toy, and Heather laughed. Asking her all about it, but then the twins came out, and they decided to dress different, this time.
Sometimes, they dressed exactly alike, because their boyfriends are into it, which is kinda weird, and isn’t that. Well, wrong? I mean, I don’t think I’d like it very much if say Dylan had a twin brother, and they were identical twins. So they could switch places in the middle of the date, and I wouldn’t be able to tell that I was actually making out with the wrong boy, but I’m only thinking about that, because Melanie won’t shut up about that weird gizmo that’s been in her. Well, inside her, and our mom most likely too.
Ew, just ew. I guess the idea that the twins sometimes dress exactly alike to switch boyfriends, and see which one is the better kisser is still kinda weird, and freaks me out, but it’s a familiar weird, because I already knew about that, for. Well, a while now.
So then, they got in, and said “Hey Mel.” They didn’t ask what she was doing here, she just scooted over to the other door to let them sit down, and close the door. So, Heather started up the car, and drove off with us.
Then, she went right back to talking about the “Rabbit.”
“What rabbit?” The twins shook their heads, and looked at each other “Jinx!” At the same time, then “You owe me a coke,” but everyone that knew them knew that they did it on purpose, because it was a game that played ever since they’re little.
“It’s not a real rabbit, it’s just like a little vibrator, on the side of a sex toy, I saw.”
“Ooh where?” one of them asked, then the other, “In a catalog, or you’re 18 now huh?”
“Nineteen, actually.” Mel looked up, and thought. Then, she tapped the back of Melanie’s seat. “You mind making a stop, on the way back to the park?”
“Well, we’ve got 2 more stops to make, but.” She looked at the clock on the dashboard, then back up at the street, and pulled up to a stop at the light. “Yeah, we’ve got time.”
So then, they started talking about sex toys, and masturbation in general, which I’d never done, I mean. All right, yeah. I’d done it, but I never Talked about it before. With my friends, my boyfriend, mother, nor even my sister. So, that was just one more thing I had to worry about, sitting there trying not to listen to them.
Then, we picked up another girl, and she asked “What are you guys talking about?” So then Mel had to tell her about the ball bearings, and the rabbit with the rotating head again, until we got to the last stop. They had to fold the seat down, so the twins could get in the back, and Melanie had to start all over.
Again, but I guess after hearing it, for the 5th time, I started getting used to the idea. Well, now it was about this rotating head thing, but she explained that. “It’s not like a drillbit, or a penis. It’s really shaped more like a tongue, and it’s got these tiny bumps all over it like taste buds, so you can imagine getting licked before you go deeper, and.”
“Huh!” I was imagining it, even though I hadn’t even seen it yet, but I had. Well, Dylan has, tried giving me oral sex back, once. I’m not really prudish, I just believed that all this privates stuff was Private. You know, something you did alone, or with your boyfriend, but that’s it, unless you had to ask somebody. Preferably somebody you trust, like your sister when the right time to go all the way might be, and yeah I’m nervous, because I’m a virgin, and Dylan is so sweet, but.
Why did I have to pick a boy that’s so big that it’s even a little scary? I could barely even get the head in my mouth, and I had to stop because I couldn’t help my teeth scraping, but he was nice enough to return the flavor, and now that Melanie said that.
“So, it really helps you, loosen up, for.” Also, I just can’t. Talk about it, out loud. I never could honestly, I have to write it down, because I just feel silly using words like fuck dick and especially pussy. Why did anybody even start calling it pussy in the first place? Cock, and dick, I get, it’s like bat. Even if it didn’t make a “Bat!” sound when you hit a ball with it, you can just look at a bat, and call it a bat, because that name fits, but pussy?
Maybe if there were better words for it, than Vagina. That’s at least as bad, only instead of something silly a little girl would say, it sounds more like something from a health class vocabulary test. Penis, vagina, cervix, hymen. Now, get out the pictures, and label all the parts with the correct term.
Clitoris:
“Ihnm!” Okay, that one. I guess, I don’t know, it sounds silly, and literal at the same time? Also, if I had to pick a favorite part, well. That’s the one that feels the best, and then Heather snapped me out of it.
“Girls shut up a minute.” They stopped giggling, and it got quiet. “It looks like we got time for another stop, so Mel.”
“Just turn up here. Right at the light, and follow it out to the loop?”
“Uh huh.” She signaled, but it wasn’t a protected right. Just the next turn, and we got there behind cars that were already waiting while the signal clicked, and it was so quiet, that’s all we could hear until Mel went on.
“Don’t get on the highway, just turn off on the service road, like you’re going to get on the highway, but keep going down the side.”
“Oh, I know where we’re going.” Somebody giggled too, but I thought ahead, and I realized she must mean the bookstore out there.
“Book store.” With a Live Arcade, Videos, Novelties, and other “Marital aids,” if you read the sign out front.
One of the twins scoffed. “Marital AIDS.” and the other one laughed, but nobody asked which one was which when they came out, dressed, and made-up different, but their faces still looked exactly alike, and we’re too busy talking about other stuff.
Stuff I wasn’t comfortable with talking about, but then Mel got out, and rolled the door shut. Heather elbowed my arm, and told me to “Roll down the window.” She had a panel with switched for all the doors, and windows on her side, but her father disabled it, because he kept bumping it with his arm going down the road, so whoever was in shotgun had to do it.
“I’m just going to go around the block, and pick you up.”
“Uh,” Mel leaned over, like a street walker asking a guy if he wants some company tonight? “I forgot my purse.”
“Oh, yeah.” Heather put it park, to dig through her purse, and the girls passed their money up for me to hold out the window, but I didn’t have any money either.
“Fifty,” she flipped through the rest of the ones, “Almost sixty bucks, so this won’t be enough for the top of the line, but I’ll see what I can get.” She folded it up, and I rolled up the window, while Heather put it in drive, and practically squealed.
“This is so exciting!”
“I wonder what she’s going to get.” All the girls agreed, and talked about what they expected, and what they wanted to see. So I didn’t have to, but Heather didn’t say anything about me being quiet again, because she’s a good friend, and she knows about me having trouble with this stuff out loud. She just pulled up, and signaled for the light.
“I hope she’s going to share.” One of the twins, all the way in the back said.
“Yeah, like you two share boyfriends.”
“No we don’t, we just made out a couple times, to solve which one’s the best kisser, once and for all.”
“So which one was it?”
“Huh!” The light changed, but at least they changed the subject to making out with boys instead of sharing sex toys, but I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Especially, Melanie “Borrowing” mom’s, and talking about it in graphic detail, as naturally as I never could.
Just loosen up, Cameron. God, it’s nothing to be ashamed of, everyone does it, and the other girls sure don’t get all nervous when they talk about it, so what’s your problem? You’re like a middle school girl, the first time a boy comes up and talks to you. “Ibe ibe ibuh,” stuttering, and tripping over your tongue, but you got over it, remember?
So what’s the big difference between kiss and tell, and talking about masturbation? Well, other than that word being another one of those words that just doesn’t sound right, but that’s no excuse. Come on, loosen up a little.
I told myself, while Heather turned, and drove under the overpass. Then waited at the next light to turn, and go back down the inside service road by the highway.
“No, just tampons.”
“Ew, why not panty liners.”
“Because they never stay put, and a tampon swells up to plug it like a cork.”
“I know, but not even fingers?”
“Well, sometimes, when I’m horny.”
“How many?”
“How many fingers? Just 2, usually. Sometimes 3, just to stretch out a little more, but then I go back to 2.”
“Yeah, 2 is the best, but which 2?”
“The first 2?”
“I like the middle 2 better.”
“Why?”
“So, I don’t have to curl up the last 2 on the side, or move my leg. They just get in the way, but my first finger, and my pinky just fit along the sides better.”
“8.” I finally let my shoulders down, and looked back, but most of them don’t want me to write their real names, for obvious reasons. Except for Heather, and Melanie, also my real name’s not Cameron, but you know Cameron Dias, before she lost all that weight, and started looking like a crack head? Or a model I guess, but it’s also kinda funny ironic that when she was a model, she had a lot more of a figure. Then she started acting, and got thinner, and thinner.
“No, ahuhn! All 8, at once?”
“Well, not all the time, but yeah.” She held her hands up, her fingers together, and then she spread it apart. “I just wanted to see how far it would stretch, and if you think about it, it’s supposed to stretch enough to push a whole baby outta there.”
“Oh, my. God!”
“Yeah, I bet I could get a whole baseball bat up in there if I tried.”
“Well, not a whole one,” the twins, “Yeah, it’s like this long.” Finishing each other’s sentences, but whichever one had her hair up, in a braid in back. She didn’t just hold her hands out over the seats, to show us. She reached down, and pulled an actual baseball bat, out from under the seat.
“Uh?” Mel knocked, and I looked down, to fumble with the window.
“No, unlock the back, I’m not climbing in through the window.” Oh yeah, the doors locked back when she took off to rive around the highway, under the overpasses.
“Huh, sorry.” I’m so embarrassed, but sure enough, she had a bag. A big bag, with a big flat box in it, and I couldn’t help trying to imagine, what could be in a box that big.
“No way, I bet you 20 bucks.”
“I bet you fifty, there’s no way you get any of it in.”
“Well,” she turned around, holding up the baseball bat, and looking at it. “I don’t have 50 bucks, but what’d you get Mel?”
She pulled the door, and Heather pulled the gear shifter to put it back in drive to take off.
“Oh my god, you wouldn’t believe the selection in there. I’m definitely going to have to come back with money. A lot more money, but she must’ve gotten it here, and the G-spot rabbit with rotating tongue action is top of the line. Almost 200 bucks!”
“Wow,” but while she was telling us all this, she was also pulling the bag off, and opening up the box. While everyone was crowing around her, except for Heather, and the girl right behind her all the way on the other side, by the other door.
She looked at the aluminum bat, and shook her head, then put it down.
“This was the most I could get, so there’s not much change left.”
“Don’t worry about the change, just get them out.”
“Uh, I’m going to find someplace, discrete.” Heather pulled off at the next turn, and ran a red light, but there was nobody else at the intersection, except for the cars up on the overpass, and I looked over my shoulder just in time to read the sign for County Road, but I didn’t bother memorizing the number. There was so many, apparently hundreds, so it was a 3 digit number anyway.
“So, we’re still going to have to share.” I turned back the other way, to see one of the twins, with her hair down, but her bangs curled up in a big wave grab a dildo, and wave it around in the way-back.
“Whrown, whrown!” Making light saber noises like a boy, and getting laughs all around. Even though it didn’t stay straight, and swung around floppily.
“You take the big end, I want the little end.” He sister grabbed it, “Okay.” Then she held up the stiffer fat end, and stuck it in her mouth!
“Oh, my god. Who wants the butt-plug.”
“Ew, not me.”
“Me neither.”
“Girls,” Mel picked it up, “Don’t drop it on the floor, it’s dirty down there.”
“Not as dirty as where it goes.”
“Yeah, but can you imagine if it got gritty, and scratched you back there?”
“I can hardly even imagine letting Carl do the butt stuff, let alone.”
“Girls!” Mel was getting exasperated. “I know, that just because it’s called a butt plug, it doesn’t mean that you have to put it in your butt.” She held it up, “Just because it’s called a hairbrush doesn’t mean you can’t use the handle for other things, right?” She finished inspecting it, and brushing stuff off of the surface, then she touched the tip. “See, the cone shape is also handy for loosening you up, so you might be able to take something the size of that.”
She pointed back, in the way back, where the twins has switched ends, and now the one with the braided hair was puffing her cheeks out, trying to get the whole head in her mouth.
“Huh, I guess the best thing is you don’t have to worry about scraping it with your teeth, like a real boy’s.”
Everyone stopped, and the twins even stopped sucking the double header to turn, and look at me.
“What?”
“How would you know?”
“Because, Dylan’s. Got that problem. Be cause he’s, a little too big.”
“For your mouth, or your pussy.”
“Well, maybe my teeth are a little too big, too.”
Then, somebody started clapping, and then everyone else started applauding me. So, I had to turn around, and hide my face, but I guess that was a breakthrough.
“You guys.”
“So, who wants to go first?”
“Wait, I’ve got a $20 dollar bet.”
“I don’t have 20 bucks, and neither do you.”
“Not on me, but you and I can settle up later.”
“Well, then you can wait until you’ve got the money.”
“Well, there’s only 2 sex toys, and the twins can share one, but you’ve already got the bat, and I bet you’re just as wet, and lose as the rest of us.”
“Well, there’s not enough room in here.”
Crunk! Heather turned around, in her seat. The whole seat turned around, and she crossed her arms.
“Uh, how did you do that?”
“There’s a little lever under the front.”
“I thought that just moved it up, and down.”
“There’s another one, behind it on the side.”
“Which, oh.” I felt it, and pulled, so it unlocked, and I could swing my legs around.
“So,” Heather turned back, right behind her. “Go on, bat girl. I’ve got 20 bucks on it, too.”
“You held out?”
“No, well. It’s for gas, but I can always tell mom we had to fill it up, and I’m sure she’ll forget when she comes back, and finds it isn’t filled all the way up, or I can tell her we filled up, and then drove around.”
“Yeah,” the twins giggled. “Bat girl, do it.”
“Well, I can’t just do it, like that. It takes a while.”
“Then you better get started,” Heather still had her arms crossed, “Because we’re not going anywhere until you settle it, one way or another.”
“Besides,” Mel said, “If you think about it, 40 dollars is a lot of money, and we can always go back to the toystore for more.”
“Well, what’ll 20 bucks get me?”
“I don’t know, your very own sex toy? So, you don’t have to improvise with your boyfriend’s baseball bat.”
“Deal.”
;
Author
I’m sorry, but people complain when I write everything in one long story. So, I’m going to have to make this Part 1…
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