I raped a girl when she thought I was a girl, she was my best friend and I loved her, and she got pregnant. But I lost it all.
I was born a boy but from the age of 7 I chose to live as a girl, but when I was 14 I went through a lot of mental and emotional stress and realised that I no longer wanted to be a girl, I wanted to be a boy again, which was the real me.
However, by then I had a big network of female friends, close friends, none of them knew or had any suspicions that I was biologically a boy and I worried that I would lose them as friends if they found out, because we’d been through so much together, I’ve slept at all of their houses, had sleepovers with them, seen them all naked and knew all of their secrets.
About 8-months before I realised I wanted to be a boy again, Kylie moved in to the area and she became one of my friends, she was a beautiful 12 year old Filipino girl, so funny, an amazing person, and I fell in love with her, she is the main reason I decided I wanted to be a boy again, meeting her made me realise what I wanted…. I wanted her!
While sleeping over at her house some nights she let me use a dildo on her, I’d go under the sheets and fuck her with the dildo and eat her sweet tasting pussy, she would ask if she could do me, I couldn’t let her see me naked because I still had a cock, so I always made the excuse that I wasn’t ready, and she was fine with that.
I couldn’t tell her what I really was, we were too far in to our friendship, too close, I’d slept in her bed with her, fucked her with a dildo and eaten her pussy, I knew her very well and sadly I knew she would never understand and never forgive me if I told her the truth, and she certainly wouldn’t want to be my friend anymore, and there was also the issue of her being a lesbian.
So I decided not to tell her, but I still wanted her, I wanted her bad.
I did something really bad, something I don’t regret doing because I got what I wanted, but still it was wrong and I feel horrible for doing it.
On this particular night when sleeping over at her house, I took a strap-on with me and asked her if she wanted me to use it, “I could fuck you with this, shall we try it?” I asked her.
She was an adventurous girl and up for trying new things, “Yeah – Lets do it.” She replied.
I turned out the lights and went in to the bathroom and put it on over my special ‘cock-conceal’ panties, then I came out and she saw it on me as I approached the bed, she sat up and reached out to rub the rubbery dildo a little, “Hands off.” I said, then she laid back down and I got underneath the sheets with her.
I moved between her legs, she was already naked and looking so delicious, “I’m going to put it in now, ready?” I asked.
“Yep – do it.” She replied.
Then I removed the strap-on under the sheets, and I pulled out my real cock and penetrated her pussy with it, it was so difficult trying not to groan with pleasure as I inserted it in to her warm wet innards, she had a wonderful tight hole, but I couldn’t let on that I was feeling anything because it was meant to be a strap-on dildo I was using.
As she moaned with pleasure I began to thrust in and out of her, “Ungh – Oh god – Mmm.” She moaned, licking her lips with delight.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“Yeah – it – it feels so real – so good – Mmm – Ungh.” She replied.
I’m not sure how she would know what a real cock feels like, she’s never had sex with a boy before, I knew that to be fact, perhaps she could feel my skin, or my balls banging against her, “It’s a real feel dildo.” I said.
I continued to fuck her, and her pussy was just so good, her bumpy innards hugging my cock all around, squeezing around my girth, it was everything I had dreamed it would be.
I lifted her legs up on to my shoulders and I leaned over her, bending her legs all the way back to her shoulders, and I drove my cock really deep in to her, pounding it in, she was moaning so loudly with orgasm I was sure the neighbours would have heard us.
I ejaculated and flooded her pussy with my seed, I groaned briefly with orgasm before realising then biting my lip to stop myself.
“Ooh – Ungh – Wh – Wha – What – What was that?” she gasped, feeling me come inside of her.
“What was what?” I asked.
“I don’t know – I never felt anything like that before.” She said.
“Was it a good feeling or bad?” I asked.
“Good – definitely good. A little weird though.” She replied.
I quickly pulled out and immediately pushed the strap-on up her hole to cover it in body fluids, then I tucked my cock back in to my panties and put the strap-on back on, then I got out of bed, she called me over and when I got close to her she grabbed the strap-on and sucked it, “Oh – Do I taste salty?” she asked.
“Sometimes you do.” I replied.
“Oh – Okay then. Thanks, babe, that was intense.” She said.
“You’re welcome.” I said, then I went to the bathroom to clean up my cock and put my pyjama bottoms back on, then I climbed back in to bed with her and we spooned and hugged all night.
And I was happy because I got to fuck her, something I’d been dying to do for such a long time.
I still wanted to be a boy, but I decided to keep my appearance so I could remain close to Kylie and continued to fuck her with my cock without her realising.
I got her pregnant a few months later, she told me she was being sick in the mornings and craving odd foods, but she never once thought that she might be pregnant, as far as she knew she’d never slept with a boy, so why would she think she was pregnant.
It was 3 months later when her baby bump formed that she went to see a doctor to find out why she was putting on so much weight and not had a period in months, she finally found out she was pregnant.
She confronted me because I was the only person to be intimate with her for the last 6 months, she still didn’t suspect I was a boy though, she first accused me of injecting her with someone’s semen.
Weeks went by, and when she couldn’t figure it out in her head how this could have happened, she got angry, and that is when she finally discovered my secret.
She pinned me down on the bed, she was remarkably strong, and she ripped off my panties, and saw my cock, “What the fuck!!! – You’re a fucking boy??!?!?” she screeched, then she fell off the bed in disbelief and utter shock, crawling away from me across the floor like she was scared shitless of me.
“I can explain.” I said.
“Get the fuck away from me!” she screamed, and then called for her dad, who came in, saw my cock hanging down, realised what had happened, and he kicked me out of the house, literally kicking the shit out of me.
As you can imagine, I never saw Kylie again after that day, at least not up close, and I don’t know why but she never told the police or anything on me, she could have, because technically I raped her, but she didn’t.
I found out through various sources that she kept the baby, and saw my daughter for the first time over a year later when I bumped in to Kylie as she was pushing the pram through the high street.
I tried to apologise but she wouldn’t even look at me.
I got to have the girl I wanted, and a beautiful baby daughter, but at what cost? – I lost them both.
I hope one day she can forgive me.